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July 19, 2015
One of the most noticeable things about myself is my serious case of having a murderous looking neutral expression. Facial expressions and body language is said to be some of the most important elements when it comes to socializing and communication. Unfortunately, I am severely lacking in both of those categories.
I’m not a very good speaker or socializer to begin with. It’s from a mixture of being shy and just being intimidated by everyone. To add on to that, I have rather awkward social habits that gives others the impression that I constantly radiate hate.
Most people’s neutral faces simply look relaxed, and some even look pleased. On the other hand, my resting expression looks like I’m ready to take down anyone who comes in close proximity to me. I tend to space out a lot, and that just amplifies the hateful looking expression to another degree. I also have a terrible habit of subconsciously crossing my arms when I’m still, which apparently is a sign to others that I don’t want to be approached.
I’ve been told by family members multiple times that I have a death glare. I can’t really be smiling 24/7, so it’s not something I can help. Recently, I walked into an Asian supermarket and decided to purchase something. After my purchase, the cashier bluntly told me that I needed to loosen my facial expression. Now, since she was an older woman, I just thanked her and left. Needless to say, I ended up avoiding talking to a cashier at any store for about a week.
When it comes to babies and kids, I’m usually the person that can never get them to laugh or show joy in any way. A small child went as far as running away from me after about 5 minutes together.
I’ve come to acceptance with the fact that I look quite scary and unapproachable when my face is completely blank. From my experiences, it seems that the majority of people do judge books by their covers. Although I did try to genuinely fix my severe death glare and aggressive body language, I’m no longer offended by the outcomes of them, which is somewhat concerning.
As someone who is terrible with confrontation and just socializing in general, this hateful stare a bit of a blessing. Of course, scaring people off probably isn’t a desirable trait for most people. As for me, I tend to enjoy minding my own business and being left alone.
To clarify, I don’t intentionally make a bitter face, but it just happened to benefit me as I got older. I’m not a terrible person. I do have friends and talk to people, but it just takes a bit of time to warm up. I like to stay in my own circle, so talking to strangers is probably one of the last things on my to do list. Personally, this stone face of mine is rather a superpower than a curse.
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